Ladybug House

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Adrianna Marie Lizaola

My daughter Adrianna felt lonely and disconnected. She carried guilt and felt like an unfair burden — she was tired. Our family lived under separate roofs for approximately two years. Adrianna could not see an end to this and so she pleaded to return to California where she was transferred to City of Hope. At that point Adrianna’s quality of life deteriorated. This was in most part due to emotional, social and environmental issues. Our family still remained separated, unable to sleep under one roof. Adrianna felt torn and sensed that she was causing all of us difficulty. She was tired of the emotional and relational tolls. At the age of 15, Adrianna’s strong faith in Jesus caused her to make a difficult decision. She believed that being completely healed in heaven and living in Jesus presence far outweighed remaining a burden here on earth. Her options were so limited: remain in the hospital to continue treatment, or receive hospice with no further treatment. Adrianna yearned to all be together as a family. She no longer wanted to feel like she was tearing her family apart. I believe that if we had any other option she would have chosen to remain in the fight. The existence of Ladybug House may have changed Adrianna’s story. I am not sure how words on a page may influence you or your decision making, but Adrianna and other children like her aren’t just words on a page. She mattered. They all matter. The death of a child is real; the experience changes you forever. My daughter isn’t just a name and a story. Adrianna was a person; embodiments of faith, worship, joy, laughter, creativity, and dance. She is… all the people that prayed for her, that love her, that knew her; she lives on in so many of those things. She does not live on merely as a memory no longer affecting the present.  Instead, Adrianna lives on as a ripple throughout our present lives and time — an echo in eternity.   — Written by Adrianna's mom, Scarlet Estrada       

 

Click here to see the note Adrianna left on her hospital room door